Don't be afraid of being different, be afraid of being the same as everyone else.  unkown

I spent a good deal of my life trying to be the same.  It was a different "same" at different points.  It depended on what person was influencing me the most at the time.

Sometimes that person did something to hurt me and I gave up on trying to be the same as him or her.  Other times I would realize after wasting months or years that I really did not want to be the same as that person.  

I think I was raised to be the same as everyone else.  My mom, bless her, was very insecure and wanted us to be the same as the people she thought were superior to us.  They weren't.  She just had a warped sense of superior.  But I learned her lesson.  And my insecurity grew as well.

There is no doubt that this upbringing gave me the mentality of having to be like everyone.  Therapy helped a bit.  Mostly my own sense of sameness began to fade.  I realized I really didn't want to be like everyone else.  I wanted most of all to be me.  Of course, I had to find out who me was.  That took some time and some reflection.

Today I'm relatively sure of who I am and what I want out of life.  It is definitely not to be like others.  I relish my freedom from that sameness.  No more having to do what that other person has told you is the only way to act.  Now you are you.  

The hardest part of becoming my own person was to give up being afraid of what the "same" people thought.  That took more time than finding who I was.  I'm okay with it now.  I embrace my "difference" as a part of my life.